******PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS IS A SPOOOF. IT IS NOT REAL. IT IS JUST POKING FUN OF THE WEDDING BETWEEN OBAMA’S HALF BROTHER AND A YOUNDG GIRL*******
Nairobi Crowd Queues Early for Obamas' Wedding , Rock Concert, & Presidential Campaign!
Festive wedding preparations are underway in Nairobi as it was announced Hussein Obama will be flying in for Brother Malik’s wedding, to his third wife, during a national holiday declared by President Mwai Kibaki.
Malik, 52, a practicing Muslim Polygamist, recently became betrothed to a 19 year old neighbor who he had his eye on for the past 5 years, according to the girl’s mother, who was not happy with the planned wedding.
According to local voting archives Malik works as a community organizer in the outskirts of Nairobi going door to door to organize voting blocks, spearhead (pardon the pun) boycotts and intimidations of banks, grain stores, schools for women, and free enterprise.
Following in the footsteps of his father, Barack Hussein Obama, Sr., Malik has managed to propagate having 14 children by his first two wives, who finally gave him an ultimatum according to the local Imam: “Find somebody else to Love!”
The young new wife to be was ultimately persuaded to marry Malik after she found out he was the brother of the President of the United States, and his Aunt Zeituni Onyango, “Auntie Zulu” is considered the unofficial first lady of Boston, where she resides in splendor, reads political futures, and is treated like royalty.
Donations to Malik and his new bride have been pouring in from all over the country, as well as outside Kenya, as major corporations and international unions seek to curry his favour.
A spokesman for Malik said the outpouring of “love’ has been so great, Malik is thinking about hiring not only a personal banker, but also a campaign manager and might run for President to fill he void left after the impending coup.
The local soccer stadium has been reserved for the nuptials, although reports have surfaced that the wedding has already been consummated and that another “Baby Bam” is on the way.
The presidential advance team has already made some security assessments of he stadium and made arrangements for Hussein’s favorite rapper, Ludicris, to fly in for a benefit show, with 55,000 tickets being given away at the local mosque after services.
The performance platform has been set up, and a curious visitor stopped by to hear them testing recordings of some of Ludicris’s best songs that went Platinum in 2008 in the run up to the election including these lyrics to a Reggae Beat:
Better yet put him in office, make me your vice president Hillary hated on you, so that b^$&%* is irrelevant Jesse talking slick and apologizing for what? if you said it then you meant it how you want it have a gut!
so get off your ass, black people, it’s time to get out and vote! paint the White House black and I’m sure that’s got ’em terrified McCain don’t belong in ANY chair unless he’s paralyzed Yeah I said it cause Bush is mentally handicapped
Speaking through an interpreter Malik said he plans a quiet honeymoon away from his other two wives, and is considering a two week trip to a Spanish Seaside Resort. “I never been before….but seester in law said really nice, and it didn’t cost nuttin….I think I be likin that, beeg time!”
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