Experience has proven that after 30, many women are not able to attract top dollar. Photo/FILE
There is a lot of debate around an article that appeared in last Thursday’s Daily Nation.
The article was titled “Would you pay Sh1 million for a wife?”
This question arose out of a certain Ms Rita Muchiri’s belief that she will not walk down the aisle for less than One million bob.
I would be very curious to find out exactly where Rita’s self-worth gauge stands- it does take quite some self-assurance to demand a 1 million bob bride price tag in the newspapers.
However, I think as a student of law, Ms Muchiri gave rather shallow arguments why anyone should pay such a hefty amount of money.
Let us begin with this magic figure of 1 million bob.
She tells us that her folks have spent about Sh1.2 million on educating her. I am at pains to understand the math behind this.
Did her parents keep every receipt of every fees bill that they paid?
Did they tabulate the number of geometry sets, erasers and pens they bought for her and if so, do we have documentary evidence of the same?
I wonder if her parents did this anticipating some massive pay-off at a later date- if they did, then Ms. Muchiri has serious issues.
I would want to imagine that a learned friend in the making would understand that education is but a fraction of one’s upbringing.
How about the clothing, medical and entertainment bills- don’t they also count as cost of upbringing?
From her argument, it would appear that Ms. Muchiri believes that dowry is a compensation programme for parents of girls.
Rita, if you have chosen to take the compensation path, then you may need to rework your numbers because they have not captured the whole picture.
It is honourable that you think your parents should get paid for their efforts, but I find that Sh1 million figure rather miserable and better suited to lottery discussions.
I want to believe that Ms. Muchiri did not pursue her education in the village polytechnic because surely, by the time one gets to 2nd year of University, one’s parents are bound to have spent more than that amount.
Rita should also advise us on what we should do if our parents chose to spend lots more on getting us value education.
If we are to follow this argument, I can see many parents who would demand tens of millions for their daughters.
I am optimistic that given her education, Ms. Muchiri is bound to attract architects, doctors and the likes as potential husbands.
If indeed she does, she will have to recognise that their parents will have spent much more time and resources on their education.
If we are to continue with Rita’s line of thinking, then perhaps we should introduce dowry payable to those men who are more educated than their wives.
After all, the more a parent spends on a child, the more he should be compensated.
Maybe our dear Rita could benefit from some anthropological studies regarding the history and functions of pride prices.
Traditionally, this amount was paid to help bring the two families together and also to indicate that the man and his family could take care of the woman.
Bride price negotiations are great grounds for ageing and retired uncles to gain relevance by testing their negotiations skills.
Therefore, Rita your desire to extract Sh1 million is really subject to how your uncles and extended family value you.
There is no way your father or uncles will let you lead the negotiations and haggle for your true worth.
You success in determining your bride price is not subject to your internal resolve and convictions regarding your true worth.
If I were you, I would spend my time ensuring that I assemble a team of tough negotiators who can give and take enough to ensure that you get married and get the right price.
Right now, all you’re posturing is nothing but hot hair or a rather desperate attempt at getting your moment in the spotlight.
I’d suggest that Ms. Muchiri goes back to the drawing board and reviews her entire strategy.
I am at pains to understand why she should claim that a woman is priceless then turn around and demand a hefty price for her affections as a wife.
Rita is most ill-informed in her assumptions that women who stay home and take care of their homes and children are of lesser commercial value that the educated ones who go to work.
It is insulting to use that line when we all know that it is almost impossible to compensate the mentoring, education and attention that stay-at-home mums give to their children.
She also should remember that when it comes to wives, men do not look for investments, they want companions.
They do not use return on investment and yield curves to gauge whether they want to start a home with someone.
If Ms. Muchiri spends some of her time in revisiting her biology and history lessons, she will discover that men will choose wives for reasons such as child-bearing hips, cooking skills and even resemblance to his mother.
I find the whole issue of women demanding heaps of money as bride price backward and primitive.
After fighting so long for emancipation, why do we demand to be sold like commodities to the highest bidder?
I’m sure the Media will be watching with interest if indeed Ms. Muchiri and her like-minded sisters get the price they imagine they are worth.
Finally, Rita you have just five years to make this dream happen – experience has proven that after 30, many women are not able to attract top dollar.
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