No dumb guys for smart women

By Ciku

“You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.” – Erica Jong.

I have a friend whose power of observation is, well, quite frankly, a bit freaky.

We recently walked past a group of six guys in various stages of disrobe (it was at a spa). It was not a leisurely stroll, but she calmly said, in what would have taken three seconds to take in, that all of them have serious money.

She didn’t mention their physiques or any physical feature. So how could she tell they had money?

Apparently, four of the guys were wearing extremely expensive timepieces. The other two were not wearing watches but had their toe and fingernails in great condition.

Good grooming paired with the company they were keeping, more likely than not, put them in the same class.

“You noticed all that in three seconds?” I asked. “Didn’t you?” she answered with a question of her own as she disappeared into the shower.

No, I can’t say that I did. But the fact that she didn’t seem to notice (or care) about their physical appearance got me curious.

A few days later, I went out with a different set of girls to a restaurant and asked about various guys in the room. The comments were interesting. “I like his shoes.” “Nice suit.”

It would seem that women notice what a man wears, the labels and the quality, perhaps what he drives and only then, do they make a decision as to whether they think he is attractive.

Men on the other hand, are the complete opposite! They notice your legs, your butt and your cleavage.

I made a comment about my dreadlocks once and someone I had known for years asked: “You have dreadlocks?” I was shocked that he had never noticed.

“I sort of look down here…” he explained with a smile, gesturing from my cleavage to the rest of my body.” Yes, a strange lot, these men.

Save your money, they don’t care too much about your Louis Vuitton bag.

I guess all our designer labels impress our girlfriends more than they do our men. Once in a while, they will compliment your shoes… If you have killer legs!

I felt the need to do some more research on this and was happy to find an author who agrees with me. Joe Quirk is his name and he claims to have conducted direct research on the subject.

He was at a fashion show that was showcasing men’s clothing. The male hunks walked down the catwalk wearing various wardrobes. There was the casual wear, then the going-on-safari look. The audience – all female – looked quite bored.

Thereafter, there was the swimsuit look, which got a few scattered giggles. These are men with washboard abdominals, mind you.

A few appreciate glances but no women were jumping out of their chairs, yelping for joy.

Then the same models came out wearing power suits and everything changed.

The women went wild! It was something approaching a simultaneous group orgasm that lasted the whole of five minutes!

How could wearing a suit be sexier than a near-naked hunk in swimming trunks?

Thereafter, Quirk attended a bachelor party. Unlike the women, he found that male arousal correlates precisely with stages of female disrobal.

He measured these findings by jaw slackitude, paucity of eye blinks, length of tongue-waggliness and the impulse to yell “Woo!” in a feminine falsetto – very similar to the mating cry of the Siamang gibbon.

Quirk experienced a rapid flow of blood away from his higher neocortex brain functions towards some yet unknown organ and at this point, further scientific observations became untenable!

He was, you see, too distracted. Ha ha. So there you have it.

Men respond to women’s physical attributes and women respond to men’s symbols of status. So guys, if your love life is a little dull and you can’t seem to get a date, invest in a nice watch, buy some expensive shoes and a couple of nice suits. This will have a direct impact on how many girls you get lucky with. “Woo!” they’ll be screaming from the sidelines.

It doesn’t really matter how cute you are, or how many hours you work out in the gym.

If the wardrobe is cheap, your chances of scoring are greatly reduced.

Meanwhile ladies, show some leg, some cleavage or wear something slightly figure hugging because that hair you spend hours under the drier getting just right? It’s totally wasted on him! When did you last wear an overall and have anyone wolf whistle at you because your hair was looking great?

If you want to hear the men go “Woo!” wear less. Men want looks, women want security.

That’s why you see lots of smart guys with dumb women but you hardly, ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy…

ciku@classic105.com